Alternate Dimension
by Miya-Kome
Summary: I wish that THIS is how the game really is! You'll know what I'm talking about if you read it....heheheheh...
1. Show me around?

I do not own Final Fantasy or any of its characters. If you sue me, that will be a very mean and a not nice thing to do.  
  
Rated PG-13 for language, suggestive themes, and...um...stupidness? Yeah, stupidness.  
  
Instead of boring you with anything else, I'll just tell you what's basically going on here. This is an ALTERNATE story to FF8. NOT a continuation! Do you get it? You sure? Ok, here it is!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Balamb Garden - Floor 1 - The Steps by the Elevator  
  
Selphie: (walking around, confused) Hmmmmmmmmmm... Where do I go next? Oh, I think class is up those stairs. I'll just - (she was cut off by Dr. Kadowaki and some Garden Staff running down the hall, pushing Squall on a stretcher)  
  
Squall: OOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!!  
  
Dr. Kadowaki: Quick, we have to get Squall to the Infirmary ASAP! Oh man, that's gonna leave a scar, no doubt!  
  
Selphie: Oh no! I'd better go check on him to make sure he's OK! Class can wait. (thinks) I even might be able to get him to join the Garden Festival!  
Quistis' Class  
  
Quistis: OK class, settle down.  
  
(Class doesn't listen. Quistis takes out her whip and they become quiet except for a boy. Quistis swings her whip, whacking the boy off the side of his head.)  
  
Boy: Aw! Oh... Sorry Instructor Trepe.  
  
Intercom: Instructor Trepe?  
  
Quistis: Yes, what is it Dr. Kadowaki?  
  
Dr. Kadowaki: We have one of your students in here.  
  
Quistis: OK, I'll be right there. sighs  
  
Boy (Seifer): Oh great! Now I have a stupid scar, too!  
Infirmary  
  
Ellone: (to Squall) So we meet again. (leaves)  
  
(Quistis comes in)  
  
Ellone: Hey, Quisty.  
  
Quistis: Oh! Hi, Elle. How's your uncle Laguna?  
  
Ellone: Sh! They're not supposed to know about that yet!  
  
Quistis: Oh... Sorry audience...  
  
(Ellone leaves for good this time)  
  
Quistis: (to Squall) I knew it'd either be you or Seifer.  
  
Dr. Kadowaki: Squall, say your name for me.  
  
Squall: SILVERDRAGON!  
  
Quistis: Hey Silver, wanna go out?  
  
Squall: Hell yeah! Let's go!  
  
Dr. Kadowaki: HEY! His name is Squall! Get it? Got it? GOOD!  
  
Quistis: Blah, blah, blah. Come on Squall, let's get you to class.  
  
(Quistis and Squall leave the Infirmary.)  
Hallway to Infirmary  
  
Selphie: (running to Infirmary) huff-puff I have to go check on that kid... OH! (she runs into Ellone) Oh, I'm sorry. What's your name? Do you know anything about that kid who was rushed in here?  
  
Ellone: (thinks) It's Sephie... I don't wanna tell her who I am now... I'll just pretend I'm in a hurry. (outloud) I'm sorry, I'm in a hurry, I have to leave! (runs away)  
  
Selphie: Humph. Well, that was strange... (Quistis and Squall walk out of the Infirmary) OH! Heeeeeeeeeey! (to Squall) Are you OK? I saw you being rushed in there. It looked like you were in pain.  
  
Squall: How so?  
  
Selphie: Like how you were crying and screaming... It sounded like you were three years old!  
  
Squall: Um, well, I...  
  
Quistis: Hmmmmmm, mister tough guy Squall. That's not that you told ME! You said that you didn't cry at all! You told me that you didn't even know that you had a cut, until they asked you how it was feeling!  
  
Selphie: (to Quistis) Who are you? His girlfriend?  
  
Squall: (naughty grin)  
  
Quistis: (blushes) Aren't you supposed to be in class... Um... What's your name?  
  
Selphie: Selphie!  
  
Squall: Hey, aren't you the head of the Garden Festival Committee?  
  
Selphie: How'd you know that? You seem like a guy who doesn't have any emotions.  
  
Squall: Well, I don't! (fakes pain) Have...to...go...to...room...Pain...  
  
(Quistis slaps him on the back of his head)  
  
Quistis: Knock it off, Squall! You're not getting out of the test!  
  
Squall: Curses!  
  
Quistis: (evil smile) Squall, Seifer thinks he can finish the test faster than you and get a better score.  
  
Squall: That's impossible! He knows that I'm the fastest test taker! (runs for classroom)  
  
Selphie: Now who will show me around this place...? sigh  
  
More to come! 


	2. Selphie still lost

I do not own Final Fantasy or any of its characters. If you sue me, that will be a very mean and a not nice thing to do.  
  
Rated PG-13 for language, suggestive themes, and...um...stupidness? Yeah, stupidness.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Selphie: (to Quistis) Will you show me around?  
  
Quistis: Nope. Got a class to teach.  
  
~Classroom~  
  
(Quistis enters the class to find Squall crying.)  
  
Seifer: Ha ha! What a baby.  
  
Quistis: What's wrong, Squall?  
  
Squall: (laughing so hard, he's crying) Seifer's crazy... Glued to his seat!  
  
(Seifer stands up. His jacket rips.)  
  
Seifer: What the?!  
  
Squall: Gotta go. Bye! (runs out of classroom)  
  
~Forest Owl Train~  
  
Rinoa: I'm soo bored! Can't this thing go any faster?  
  
Zone: No, but it gives you time to think about what you're going to say to Cid.  
  
Rinoa: Oh, God. Don't remind me. I'm nervous enough as it is.  
  
Zone: Heehee. Sorry. How did we get this meeting with Cid, anyway?  
  
(Rinoa smiles)  
  
Zone: Oh, let me guess. Was it lover boy?  
  
Rinoa: Hey! We're not like that! ... We're just friends...  
  
Zone: GOOD friends, you mean. Why don't you just tell him how you feel?  
  
Rinoa: I don't! I just don't want to spoil what we have.  
  
(pause)  
  
Rinoa: And I feel like there's someone else out there for me. Like a friendly competition with someone out there for him. (thinking) You know who you are...  
  
Zone: Really? Who?  
  
Rinoa: I don't know, but maybe I'll find out at the party, so I can't decide my feelings for Seifer 'till then.  
  
(Just then, Watts comes running in and trips over.)  
  
Zone & Rinoa: Hahahahahaha!  
  
(Watts stands up)  
  
Watts: I'm glad my pain is so funny, sirs.  
  
Rinoa: Sorry. What is it?  
  
Watts: We're about one hour away from the Garden, sir.  
  
Rinoa: Oh, ok. Well, I guess I better go and get ready. (turns and leaves)  
  
Watts: Do you think one hour will be enough, sir?  
  
Zone: Probably not. Better tell the driver to slow down.  
  
Watts: Yes sir!  
  
~Garden~  
  
(Seifer runs out of the classroom after Squall. Turning the corner, he runs into Selphie and they both land on the ground.)  
  
Seifer: Where's Squall?!  
  
Selphie: He's long gone. Say, can you show me around this place?  
  
(Seifer gives a stupid face.)  
  
Selphie: It'll make you look better than Squall. (Seifer jumps up)  
  
Seifer: Let's make this short.  
  
(They arrive at the front.)  
  
Seifer: Okay, here's the directory. (points backward) There's the entrance/exit.  
  
Joggind Kid: Hey, nice jacket, Seifer!  
  
(Seifer takes off after the kid)  
  
Selphie: Wait, you're not done! (she sits on the floor and sighs)  
  
(Sounds of punches and shrieks come from the distance.)  
  
Distant Voice: Please... Stop... My... cards... My... face...  
  
Selphie: (gets up) What the hell was that?!  
  
(She runs down the hall to see Zell beating up a student)  
  
Selphie: Heeeeeeeeeeey! Zell, what the hell do you think you're doing?!  
  
Zell: Oh, hi Selphie. Well, this guy here chalenged me to a game of cards. I won, and he didn't want to lose any of his cards. He took off and I chased him. When I caught him, he still didn't want to lose any of his cards, so...  
  
Selphie: So?  
  
Zell: (proud look) So I beat him up!  
  
Selphie: sigh Zell, what are we going to do with you? (to the student) Hey you. You still have to give Zell one of your cards.  
  
Student: H-here! Take 'em all! I'm outta here! (runs away)  
  
Zell: ALL RIGHT! Check out all the cards I got, baby!  
  
Selphie: Hey Zell... Um... Do you wanna joint he Garden Festival Committe?  
  
Zell: (sweat) Uh... WHOA! Look at the time! Gotta go! (takes off)  
  
Selphie: Wait, Zell!  
  
Zell: (stops) What?  
  
Selphie: Don't you have to get to class?  
  
Zell: That's right! Damn, late again... Detention, here I come... Hey, what about you?  
  
Selphie: Oh, I have to work on the Garden Festival! See ya! (takes off)  
  
Zell: Bye... (runs to class)  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
More comin! This is gonna be a long one I know it's not that funny right now. Don't worry, it'll get funnier as it gets along. 


	3. Next Mission

I do not own Final Fantasy or any of its characters. If you sue me, that will be a very mean and a not nice thing to do.  
  
Rated PG-13 for language, suggestive themes, and...um...stupidness? Yeah, stupidness.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
~Fire Cavern~  
  
Quistis: Sure is hot in here.  
  
Squall: Oh yeah it is...  
  
Ifrit: Hey! Don't be gettin horny! You gotta fight me!  
  
Squall: SHIVA! I SUMMON THEE!  
  
(Shiva ices Ifrit)  
  
Ifrit: Say wha??? They got Shiva! WAH! COLD! Ok, I'll join you!  
  
*Acquired Ifrit*  
  
Squall: (grins) So uh... Where were -  
  
Quistis: BOMBS!  
  
(Three bombs approach.)  
  
Squall: SHIVA! I SUMMON THEE!  
  
Shiva's Voice: Sorry Squall, bathroom break. Be back in 5.  
  
Quistis: Ugh... Useless low level GFs. (whips bombs to death)  
  
(They leave the Fire Cavrn and go into the Forest to find a T-Rexaur.)  
  
Quistis: Ugh... Hate these guys.  
  
(Her whip goes around his mouth, keeping it shut. Meanwhile, Squall Renozokukenizes it to death.)  
  
Quistis: Who's next? Anyone else wanna piece of Instructa Trepe?!  
  
(Monsters cower in fear.)  
  
Qustis: That's what I thought.  
  
~Back at Balamb Garden~  
  
Quistis: Nice job, Squall!  
  
Squall: Uhhhhhh, thanks.  
  
Quistis: Why do you act like that?  
  
Squall: Like what?  
  
Quistis: You never have anything to say! You know, it would hurt to tell me "You were awsome out there!" Women like compliments.  
  
Squall: But the heck!! You're my instructor, and I'm your student.  
  
Quistis: Oh, Squall...  
  
Squall: I'm just going to bed. See you later...  
  
~Next Day~  
  
(Squall's sleeping peacefully in his dorm room. All of a sudden, he hears someone banging loudly on his door, giving him a very rude awakening.)  
  
Squall: (thinking) Who the hell was that...?  
  
~Later, by the Directory~  
  
Quistis: Hey, good morning Squall. How do you feel?  
  
Squall: None of you're...  
  
Quistis: Business! (giggles)  
  
Squall: DAMN INSTRUCTOR! If you know what I'm going to say, why do you even ask?!  
  
Quistis: That's my Squall, deep and angry!  
  
Squall: Grrrrrrrr!  
  
Quistis: Oh yeah, Squall, new mission. You, Seifer, and another member will go to Dollet. Mission briefings will be done in the vessel. Hey, here he comes. Zell, come over here...  
  
(Zell come punching and flipping.)  
  
Zell: OUUUUUUUUCCCCCHHHHHHH!!! DAMN, I FELL!  
  
Zell, After Pain Relieves: Hey, so you're the one called Squall, heh? Nice to meet ya. Put it there!!!  
  
Squall: Are you the one that by any chance woke me up this morning? (made a suspicious/angry face while asking)  
  
Zell: Yeah.  
  
Squall: (takes his Gunblade out) Listen here, you. Next time you do that, you're dead!!!  
  
Zell: Calm down man!! WOW! Sorry man!  
  
Squall: Ok!  
  
Quistis: And your leader will be Seifer!  
  
Squall: (thinking) What the hell is she thinking?!?!  
  
(Seifer and the Disciplinary Committe come.)  
  
Seifer: So, long time no see, Squall. Are you done crying?  
  
Squall: LISTEN HERE YOU DUMBASS!!! IF YOU CAN'T FIGHT, THEN DON'T EVEN GO TO THE TRAINING CENTER!!! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO CHARGE AN ATTACK WITHOUT ME KNOWING! AND TO MAKE IT WORSE, IT WAS MAGIC! (sarcasticly) Ohhhh, but I'm pretty sure I didn't make YOU cry.  
  
Seifer: HUH?! Ohhhhhh, yyyyyeah... Ummmmmm, I did not, uhhhhh cry.  
  
Squall: You're so stupid.  
  
Quistis: Alright, you guys can fight later!!! Now to the vessel!!!  
  
(Seifer, Squall, Zell, and Quistis are in the car on the way to Dollet)  
  
~In the car~  
  
Zell: Hey Squall! Can I take a look at your Gunblade???  
  
Squall: NO!  
  
Zell: Ohhhhhh man, pleeeeaaaase?  
  
Squall: NO!  
  
Zell: Not even a peek?  
  
Squall: Hmmmmmmm, Ok. You wanna see it? Fine then.  
  
(Squall takes out his Gunblade and is about to slash Zell.)  
  
Zell: (sweat) FINE! I'll just see it in battle! 


	4. Onboard the Vessel

I do not own Final Fantasy or any of its characters. If you sue me, that will be a very mean and a not nice thing to do.  
  
Rated PG-13 for language, suggestive themes, and...um...stupidness? Yeah, stupidness.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
~Inside the Vessel~  
  
(Xu comes in, starts to talk, and explains the situation...)  
  
Seifer: Hey Squall! Can you go check outside?  
  
Squall: You go!!  
  
Seifer: Squall, I am the leader. You are not the leader. I command you. You can't even tell me to do one single thing, because if you do, when the mission is over, I'll tell HM Cid you did baaaaaad, and he'll take points off your part of the mission.  
  
Squall: Seifer, you can't be any stupider, can you??  
  
Seifer: What do you mean?  
  
Squall: Listen 'captain'. First of all, I don't have to everything you say. Second of all, how can YOU tell HM Cid I did bad once the mission is over? We won't even get a chance to see him, Quistis will!!! Oh yeah, and last... If YOU don't go out there right now and check what's going on outside, I think I'LL have to be your leader. (takes out gunblade and points to Seifer)  
  
Seifer: (shivers) Brrrrrr... You give me the chills.  
  
Squall: NOW!!!  
  
Seifer: (grumbles and goes outside)  
  
Zell: Nice going my man!!!  
  
Squall: Thanks yo!!!  
  
~Outside~  
  
(Seifer walks out and takes a look at the area.)  
  
Seifer: Hmmm... No threats. Just a dog, some kids, an army of Galbadian Soldiers ready to kill us, another dog...  
  
(Seifer walks back inside and hears someone talking.)  
  
Squall: Quistis should've made me the leader. Seifer's just a... (looks and sees Seifer)  
  
Zell: See anything interesting?  
  
Seifer: A dog with a purple tounge, an army of Galbadian Soldiers who want us dead, and some kids.  
  
Zell: WOW! A dog with a purple tounge! I've gotta see that!  
  
~In the army~  
  
Wedge: Who's that spikey haired kid? Don't tell me he's someone from Garden!  
  
Biggs: What about that blonde haired one with the grey jacket and that huge gunblade?  
  
Wedge: Hey, the blonde guy and Spikey-Hair are talking about something.  
  
~Back to Squall~  
  
Squall: What about that Galbadian army?  
  
Zell: What Galmadian ar... Geez! Galbadians! Oh no!  
  
Seifer: Chickenwuss.  
  
Squall: Haha. That's a funny name!  
  
Seifer: (looks at Squall) Dimwit!  
  
~Wedge and Biggs~  
  
Biggs: Looks like they said something about chicken.  
  
Wedge: Good. I'm hungry...  
  
~Esthar City, Presidential Residence~  
  
(Kiros and Ward walk in and stand to attention in front of Adel.)  
  
Adel: Well (to Ward) What is it?  
  
Ward: .......  
  
Adel: What?  
  
Ward: .......  
  
Kiros: What he's saying is-  
  
Adel: Silence! Now, what were you saying?  
  
Ward: .......  
  
Adel: Speak up, man!  
  
Ward: .......  
  
Kiros: Dr. Odine has finished and is ready to start at any time.  
  
Adel: Well, why didn't you just say so? Honestly, you pay peanuts...  
  
(She gets up and walks out.)  
  
Kiros: (mumbles) I'm going to fucking kill her...  
  
Adel: What was that?  
  
Kiros: Nothing your highness...  
  
~The Vessel Selphie's on~  
  
Selphie: (humming) Hmmmmmmmmm, hmmmmm, hmmmmmm, hmmmm...  
  
Student: Would you PLEASE stop singing? I'm trying to review my notes!  
  
Selphie: Ok. ............... Hmmmmmmmmmmm, hmmmmmmm...  
  
Student: HEY!  
  
Selphie: You said I couldn't SING, not HUM! Hmmmmmmm, hmmmmmmm, hmmm, hmmmmmmmm...  
  
Student: JUST DON'T DO ANYTHING! (mumbles loudly) Anoying little bitch...  
  
Selphie: WHAT WAS THAT?!  
  
Student: I said you were an annoying b- Hey... You're that girl with that hyper kid who beat me up 'cuz of card... Aren't you?  
  
Selphie: Tee-hee. Yup!  
  
Student: NOOOOOO! I'm sorry! Don't tell Zell, kay?! Well, gotta go! Bye!  
  
(He runs out, jumps out of the vessel, and jumps into the nearest one... The one with Squall and Co.)  
  
Selphie: What a freaky little kid....  
  
~Squall's Vessel~  
  
(the kid is now on board)  
  
Seifer: Who is this kid?  
  
(Zell looks at the kid strangely)  
  
Zell: Do I know you?  
  
Student: Umm... Uhhh...  
  
Zell: You look familiar.  
  
Student: No I don't!  
  
Zell: Oh, okay.  
  
Squall: Hey Quistis, how long are we going to stay on this boat?  
  
Quistis: Just a couple more minutes. Geez Squall... You're jsut as bad as a two year old!  
  
(Squall gets into a fit)  
  
Squall: NO I'M NOT!  
  
Seifer: What the heck is this stuck to my boot? (picks up a Shiva card) What's this, a Triple Triad card! Who has cards on this boat?!  
  
Student: (trys whistling, but realizes he can't, so starts humming instead) Hummmm humm hum hummmmmmm hummm...  
  
(Seifer pokes Student. Hundreds of cards fall out.)  
  
Zell: NOW I KNOW WHO YOU ARE! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO STOLE MY FUNGUAR CARD!!!  
  
Student: Seeya! (grabs as many cards as he can and jumps in the water and swims away. Zell jumps in after him.)  
  
(Seifer slumps back in his seat.)  
  
Seifer: What a bunch of kids...  
  
~More coming!~ 


End file.
